Busy doing everything and nothing all at once...

I have been more than slightly AWOL from blogging of late. Its just that, well, I haven't had much of interest to write about, and when I have, I have been so very busy that I just haven't had the time to write about it. So here is a rundown of what has been keeping me so busy doing nothing in particular.

BabyCenter as always is just a constant source of work. Appointing new moderators, editing potty mouth members, sticking and unsticking posts for my lovely mods. Of course the danger is that I sit down to do my work for the day and end up wasting hours and hours cruising around BC to see what is going on, sprung some secret pregnancies that way or I just check in on FB and well... need I say more.

Scrapbooking. I have returned to scrapping and am loving it. Not only do I love the creative outlet, I love the time to myself. I don't have to worry about if I can hear the kids, or what to cook, or the washing, its just me, photos and coloured paper.. well and all those lovely lovely embellishments in the store.

ABA. Meetings are always a good time out, and recently I organised our groups fundraiser, we had the very lovely and talents Susan Darcy come and photograph our families. She is very generously donating 100% of the booking fee plus 10% of sales back to our group. Naturally my kids were wonderful alone, hamming it up for the camera, but because mumma was desperate for a great shot of the 2 of them together, neither child wanted to play. Actually let me correct myself there, Xave was more than happy to sit with his sister, Stella was cranky and did not want anyone touching her or putting her on the ground..brother or not.

And most exciting of all was our family trip to Sydney. We flew with Tiger, which is always asking for trouble, but for $25 what more can you expect. Flight was cancelled, switched to flight 3.5hours later, lady at check-in was a bitch and it took all I had not to tell her so. Hotel was great, kids were great, we did lots of walking, I did lots of drinking with BC girls and Xave was in heaven, between a day including a car, bus, plane, train and ferry what more could a little boy want. The kids even slept in the pram and sat next to each other in the side by side without killing each other. Pleasant change me thinks.

Oh almost forgot, I also did my first baby and kids market with BBH nappies and it was really good. Not huge sales, but lots of people took info, so fingers crossed they become customers. Next market I am going to organise the table a bit differently and print of a list for people to sign up to my mail list, I did mean to do this for that market but just forgot. Live and learn.

Finally, the children are starting to play so much nicer together. There is less and less hitting and pushing and more and more cuddles and kisses.. although one needs to watch Stella closely... I have a BITER!!!! nooooo she pretends she is coming of for a kiss.. and chomp, she gets ya. She bites me, Xavier and the other day her friend Nazeem... how embarrassing...

So as you can see, have been busy but not really doing much at all...

Spoke too soon...

Yesterday arvo Xave woke with a temperature. Nothing drastic, but after being awake for just over an hour he took himself back off to bed and slept for almost 16 hours straight. Definitely not normal 2 year old behaviour.

This morning he had perked up a bit, but in the shower pretty much crashed again, Adam said he was on all fours just shivering on the shower floor, not a good look. He did muster enough energy to scream at Adam however, when he turned the shower off. He also found the energy to scream at us as we tried to get him dressed (no, no pants, no tee shirt, no jocks) he wanted to wear a towel and nothing else. We had talked about going shopping before he got in the shower, while he was bouncing on the bed, and boy oh boy did her remember that after his shower. We were trying to talk him around to lying down for a rest, but alas he screamed at us some more that he wanted to go shopping. Luckily Stels was also very ready for a sleep by this point, so she went down in her cot and he crashed in our bed with Daddy lying with him.

After he woke his temperature was much higher so off to the Dr's we went. Surprisingly only an hour wait for an extended hours bulk billing clinic nearby. We have had to go there a few times of a Sunday or public holiday and have always had really great Dr's there. Granted when I had pleurisy I had to wait almost 4 hours with a newborn to see a Dr, despite having chest pains, but today wasn't so bad.

I was possibly mean mummy, but I didn't give him any panadol before we went to the Dr's, because I didn't want his temperature or behaviour masked by pain relief, I wanted the Dr to see what was actually going on, besides he had had some in the early hours of the morning. By the time we go in to see the Dr his temp was 40.8 OMG that's crazy high. Dr checked him over and found nothing wrong with him as such, we were sent off to the nurse for a dose of panadol and to be observed. His temp came down and the Dr asked to see us again. We have been asked to get a urine sample and go back to see him again tomorrow.

Since coming home we have had another big sleep, a few small spews and a hilarious wee collection tale. He has been in a nappy most of the day due to him sleeping so much, but after a bath, which he protested loudly about getting into, then protested louder about getting out of, we put him in some jocks. He started whinging, we asked if he needed to go to the toilet, we had talked about the special cup he needed to do wees in for the Dr (oh the conversations you have as a parent) and he agreed. Adam was holding the cup (good job daddy) as Xave proudly pee'd into it... when I hear..'problem, problem'... Xave had a big big big wee ready to go, much more than the cup could handle, I attempted to push the potty over to catch the overflow, and was thwarted by the lid closing as I slid it across the floor... result, a full cup of wee AND wee all over the floor... I was laughing so hard there were tears.

So for now, he is asleep in our bed, whether he stays there or not is yet to be seen. Temperature is under control, mood has improved, wees is collected.. lets see what the night brings and what the Dr has to say tomorrow.

Plodding along nicely...

No really we are just plodding along nicely. Which is great in one sense, life is good, but bad in the sense of having anything remotely interesting to blog about...

Kids are still fighting, but Stels is starting to walk more and more, nowhere near enough for me to say that I have a walker, but taking more and more steps every day. And rather chuffed with her efforts too I might add. Xavier seems to be growing out of the baby talk and starting to use big boy words again... he will just parrot back anything you say to him, (mental note, clean up the potty mouth) and has taken to calling his sister Missy Moo! So very cute of him.

Both kids are starting to enjoy swimming, Stella has taken to it much better than he has however, but I think that perhaps its her youth (compared to him) that makes her a bit less fearful in the water.

Toilet training is going well, not even any hilarious stories coming from there. He wears jocks, he tells me when he needs to go if we are out, all too easy... still in nappies at night time though, despite his insistence that he doesn't need them.

So really just wanted to let you all know that I'm alive, just bored and boring...

My Questions Answered...

Ok so here goes... not as popular as I hoped it would be.... surely with 32 followers, I could have got some more questions... you guys suck...but I still love you....hehe...

Sazz asked;
My question: why don't you want to breastfeed Xave/why won't you let me? ;) I wink but I am curious.

Well its not that I don't want to breastfeed Xavier, its more than I never pictured myself feeding an almost 2.5 year old. I get that people do, I don't have an issue with others doing it, but its just not something I ever imagined doing for me. In saying that, part of me is so amazed that at his age Xavier has worked out how to attach and feed, that I feel like maybe I should allow him to feed, and on occasion I do in fact let him. He doesn't have a huge interest, he doesn't stay on long, really its more of a game to him, but I take the same approach with him that I plan on taking with Stella as she approaches 2, never offer, never refuse.. although I do often offer something else instead. So if and when he asks, and if I feel that its an appropriate time and place, I will allow him to have a quick feed.

I also choose not to blog or FB about this as I know many people I know in real life (I don't care that much what people I don't know irl think) would be completely freaked out by this and I don't feel that its really anyone else's business what I do with my kids and my breasts in the privacy of my own home.

Now to why wont I let you feed Xavier.. well, this is going to be a hard one without possibly causing some offence to someone, so apologies in advance. Cross nursing/co-feeding is just not for me or my kids. Again I don't have a problem with others doing it, I strongly believe that everyone has the right to make their own choices for their bodies and their babies. I have proven that I am more than happy to provide my expressed breast milk to someone else's child, and would happily accept EBM from someone else if my kids needed it, but personally I would feel uncomfortable actually putting someone else's child to my breast and well if either of mine drank from someone else's breast I would be as jealous as all hell. I worked hard to make enough milk for my daughter, and damn it she will appreciate it and not go looking for it somewhere else...

hope that answers it for you.

apwool asked;
ok, gulp, I will ask you one that I have wondered about and I hope you don't think I am being rude!! Just curious is all :) I'm certainly not asking because I think you were wrong, you just never really said in her arrival story why, and I am really nosey LOL
Why did you have an elective c/s with Stella?

This is something I am happy to talk about apwool. There are a number of reason, the first being I assumed once a CS always a CS. My obs (who I do adore) seemed to think that another CS was the best option for me seeing as there was such a small gap between my babies. He felt the risk of a VBAC was probably too high after only 16 months, he did say had it been 2 years he would have pushed me to VBAC, so he isn't against VBAC at all. I also spoke to the midwives (yes you must all remember that I am not a homebirther and would never choose to, nothing against it, just not for me) and she talked to me about the possibility of a VBAC. She talked me through the hospitals policy on VBAC and basically I would have been strapped to the bed on monitors, allowed to move very little and not allowed to have any pain relief (as I needed to be able to feel what my scar was doing at all times)... sorry but that doesn't really sound that natural to me at all. The final reason was that the CS with Xave was the most civilised thing ever. I am a control freak and I loved knowing the day I was having a baby. I recovered well and felt great. I had a very positive CS experience and honestly didn't feel that I missed out on anything. I have 2 healthy children, no one looking at them knows how or where they were born.

I should add, that since meeting that crazy hippy freak, Sazz, IF (my tubes are tied so really its a big hypothetical) I was to have another baby, I would try to VBA2C. It would still be in a hospital, I would still see my obs for antenatal care, but I would attempt to VBAC. In saying that, I still don't regret the decisions I made to have 2 CS.

Jessica asked (via FB);
What does your name mean?

Well, seeing as my folks made it up it doesn't really mean anything. I once looked it up in a name book (lets be honest, every name book I pick up I look for my name) and the book said that Kin means golden and Tara means tower... so I guess Kintara could mean, golden tower... hmmm tall blonde? I think not, my folks stuffed that one up didn't they...lol

They did get it from a racehorse named Kenny's Tara apparently that they won some money on and played around to come up with my name.

Leesa asked (via FB);
what made you get into feeding other peoples nappy addictions and sell BBH?

Because I wanna be Emma...lol... sorry, I have a friend Emma who works for them to, and we joke that she converted me to cloth, bf, BBH, so I just want to be her clone.

In all honesty, for a long long time, I have secretly (well not so secret now) wanted to open my own shop. I want to be my own boss. I want to sell cloth nappies, I believe that when people can see and touch they are converted, baby wearing gear, where people can hire carriers before purchasing, breastfeeding stuff and hand made clothes and gifts from WAHM... I have no idea where I would even begin to finance this dream of mine, so in the meantime, I started selling BBH. I love their products (nappies and the best baby carrier, ergo's), there wasn't anyone representing the Mornington Peninsula (my area) and the extra cash comes in handy to finance my own nappy addiction... Seriously, I have been selling for 4 months now, and only this month has my account started to make a profit..lol

Jade asked (via FB);
Why is the sky blue???

I have no freaking idea... you are the science teacher, you tell me....lol

Ealesy asked;
What's you most and least favourite kind of reptile?

To be honest, I really dont dig reptiles at all. I have no interest is looking at them or holding them of having them anywhere near me. I hope that the kids never want to have a reptile for a pet, because they are going to be told no, they can wait until they move out of home.... ooo hang on I just did a google, and I dont mind turtles.... so turtles are my fav reptile.... yes I had to check there were in fact reptiles.

Ask me a question...

So I kind of got this idea from another blog, was just scanning and found a blog where she was answering questions, not sure when/where she was asked but it gave me a blog idea.... seeing as I have so many loyal followers, i encourage you all to ask me a question and I will answer it...

You can be random, or funny (or try to be) or serious or a little bit naughty... and I will endeavour to answer then all...

so come on, ask away...

Brother Anxiety...

Stella has been somewhat challenging of late. If I am not within arms reach or clear sight, she has a complete and utter meltdown... and well, its not a mummy thing, if daddy is about she is OK or any other adult to be honest.

Its exhausting, having to constantly be near her, reassuring her from the next room is not enough and its heartbreaking hearing her sobbing as she crawls trying to find me, while I'm trying to just do something (get dressed, washing, wee). Nothing is getting done around the house (Adam would argue that it never really does) but while I have worked out cooking with a child on my hip and I can kind of load the dishwasher and put on a load of washing, hanging it out is impossible... and don't get me started on folding it or putting it away. Sweeping the floor with child on hip is doable, but not easy.

I was putting it down to separation anxiety, which is new to me. Xave was such a chillaxed little dude that he never really got upset if we left the room, he would just happily play on his own until we returned. Just one more difference between my kids.

But yesterday, I came to a new realisation... Stella is not suffering separation anxiety at all... she is suffering brother anxiety!!! Meaning, she is anxious when she is left alone with her brother.

I came to this realisation yesterday when Miss woke a good half hour before he did. And she was a different child. She played happily alone in the family room while I was packing nappy orders in the lounge, she even got out of her chair and took 2 unaided steps across to her music table (YAH!) I was able to wander around the house without a sobbing mess following me, she was smiley and happy and beautiful.

But that all changed once Xave woke up... as soon as she heard him, she cried as soon as I was out of her sight. She followed me around sobbing...rightly so, seeing as Xavier was also grabbing, pulling and pushing her more than necessary.

I am at my wits end with the both of them. This past month, putting them both in full time care and returning to paid work, really does seem to be the easy option. Of course, in my heart, I know that being away from them so much would just break my heart and really isn't what I want to do at all.. but some days... geez... its tempting.

She has started assertive herself more when he takes things from her, mainly with screams and calls of 'mumma' for help, but if she had it first, she holds on tight and doesn't back down easily. He does really love her, he tries to give her cuddles which end in headlocks and her screaming, he shares his food with her and always asks me for one for Stella too (although he does always give her the little one) but I have noticed of late, she has stopped looking at him with the complete adoration she did when she was younger (you know because she is soooo old and all) instead she looks at him with reservation, just a look of not being sure what he is going to do to her at any given moment, and it breaks my heart.

baaaa I'm a sheep...

...yes I did it, I got me an Iphone.. and well, I was pretty excited about the whole deal, but well, now that its here, I'm a bit meh about it.

Sure it pretty, and smooth and shiny, but well... Im not yet in love with it.

Granted I need to update my calendar and my contacts but well... those of you who have one, let me in on some tips to make me love the thing that I am no committed to for 2 years.

I have downloaded the facebook app (naturally) but thats it.. what else should I be downloading on it? Free downloads that is, far to tight to buy them?

Also should probably put some music on it, ringtone choices are not awesome....

hmm ideas people please..